Women are often the initiators of divorce for a variety of common reasons. Divorces often result in long-term happiness, but that doesn’t make the decision any easier. Especially knowing the reality that women often face higher emotional tolls and financial risks during the divorce process. With planning and the support of a divorce attorney, divorce can be the change that sets your life up for greater success and increased happiness.
Child custody, child support, alimony, and property division are all major concerns for women getting divorced. A divorce attorney can provide strategic guidance on how to move forward. Uncertainty is often one of the hardest parts of divorce. A good strategy can make the difference in getting the results you want that set you up for success in your next chapter.
Some women hesitate to move forward with divorce because of concerns about income, retirement, insurance, and custody. Divorce is a big change, but with the right information and planning, you can move forward with confidence and clarity instead of fear. You don’t have to go through this alone. A divorce lawyer will be your advocate for you and help you achieve the best outcome.
Women are more likely to have taken a step back from their careers to accommodate raising children and are more likely to be the lower earning spouse. They may feel financially vulnerable as they consider divorce.
Women may have anxiety about not having sole placement of the children, since they are more likely to carry the bulk of the child rearing responsibilities, like managing the school schedule, extracurricular activities, and medical needs.
Knowing more about the process and laws on these issues can help you navigate the divorce strategically.
Women are more likely to have taken a step back from their careers to accommodate raising children and are more likely to be the lower earning spouse. They may feel financially vulnerable as they consider divorce.
Women may have anxiety about not having sole placement of the children, since they are more likely to carry the bulk of the child rearing responsibilities, like managing the school schedule, extracurricular activities, and medical needs.
Knowing more about the process and laws on these issues can help you navigate the divorce strategically.
Many women put off divorce because they are worried they cannot afford life after the divorce. That is a valid concern, but there are a lot of specifics that affect the final numbers. Child support and spousal support may be awarded depending on the circumstances, for instance.
Assets are generally divided 50/50 in Wisconsin. This includes retirement accounts. Even if the wife was a stay at home mom and the husband says all the retirement money belongs to him, that is not the letter of the law.
The marital home (and mortgage) can be awarded to one party as part of the property division, or the home can be sold and profits split. While many people are attached to the marital home, selling the property and downsizing may be the best choice depending on your circumstances.
If you are experiencing domestic violence or if you are concerned you will experience domestic violence when your spouse finds out you are leaving, it’s important you plan carefully.
End Domestic Abuse WI and Women’s Law are two places that offer planning resources so you can leave your abuser safely.
If there’s immediate danger, you can file a petition for a temporary restraining order (TRO) to stop contact, harassment, or physical abuse.
It is not uncommon for a woman’s identity to feel very intertwined with her role as a wife and mother. This is true for women in all situations, but can be especially prevalent in stay at home moms, who have relied on their spouse for financial stability.
Experiencing anxiety or depression is very common when going through a life change like divorce. It can help to get support from family, friends, or a therapist. There are also divorce support groups and podcasts that can help.
Try sticking to a structure or routine. This not only helps you, it can help your children as well, who are also going through emotional uncertainty.
To prepare for divorce, it’s a good idea to understand your options and your current household finances. To the best of your ability, determine all the different financial accounts your household has and make a list of all known debts. Then gather or make copies of:
Think about housing options. Can you realistically afford to keep the home, or would selling put you in a better long-term financial position? Consider what matters most to you, so you can strategize with your attorney on how to accomplish those goals.
Child custody and child placement decisions are based on what is in the “best interest of the child.” The court starts with the assumption that the frequent and meaningful contact with both parents is in the child’s best interest, but that does not always mean a 50/50 placement schedule. Joint custody, which means both parties have decision-making authority for the child, is presumed to be the best for the child as well. However, that can be overcome if the circumstances indicate that would not be best for the child.
A court looks at several factors to determine custody and placement issues including:
If the parents cannot come to an agreement, often a guardian ad litem (GAL) is appointed to advocate for the child.
Custody and placement do not directly impact who gets the house. The house is considered a property division issue, and all the assets should be divided fairly, which is not directly related to who gets custody or placement. If the parties don’t agree on property division, the court may take the children’s stability into consideration when making their decision, but that’s not the only factor that would be considered even in that scenario.
Child support is calculated based on each party’s income, the number of children, and the child placement schedule. Often these factors lead to the mother being awarded child support, but not always.
Verbal agreements are strongly discouraged. By having a court order, there is recourse if your ex stops making payments. Unpaid child support does not disappear in bankruptcy and may be recovered by wage garnishment or taken from tax refunds. Licenses can be suspended and passports can be denied if there are arrears. None of this is possible if there is no court order.
Separate from child support, the court can also make orders regarding specific child-related costs. This can include splitting medical costs, childcare costs, extracurricular activity costs, and other variable costs. How and if these costs are considered can depend on the placement schedule and other variables.
Wisconsin is a community property state, meaning the presumption is that all assets acquired in the marriage will be divided 50/50. This includes both assets and debts. The court can decide to deviate from that 50/50 split based on factors like the length of the marriage, the age and health of each party, each party’s earning capacity, and more.
Because Wisconsin is a no-fault state, marital misconduct, like cheating, is not considered in property division. However, marital waste, like draining bank accounts or hiding assets, can be considered.
The parties can also come to an agreement on their own. As long as the court determines it is fair, they will sign off on it even if it is not strictly 50/50.
Spousal support, also called spousal maintenance or alimony, is not as set in stone as child support. There isn’t a set equation, but when calculating alimony, the court considers how long the marriage lasted, the earning capacity for each party, the health and age of each party, any previous agreements made, and other factors. It can be temporary or permanent.
While spousal maintenance is generally thought of as the husband paying the wife, that is not always the case. Women can pay men spousal support if the circumstances of their marriage support that decision. For instance, if the husband was a long-time stay at home dad he may be awarded spousal maintenance, just like a stay at home mom might.
The challenges women face in divorce are real, but they are manageable with the right strategy. An attorney can help you get the best result possible by utilizing all options available.
